


Who Wouldn’t?

by Peachymarkhyuck



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Fluff, M/M, Slice of Life, chensung - Freeform, markhyuck, nomin, side of NoRen, slight angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-15
Updated: 2018-05-15
Packaged: 2019-05-07 10:51:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,726
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14669586
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Peachymarkhyuck/pseuds/Peachymarkhyuck
Summary: Na Jaemin was always head over heels for Lee Jeno but unfortunately he was already taken by his friend named Huang Renjun.Jaemin never confessed to Jeno but a series of events happened, will it lead to him confessing?





	1. The Past

**Author's Note:**

> I suck at making stories but I always try my very best so I hope you enjoy this 5 chapter story.

/ this is a flash back on Jaemin’s life when he was in 10th grade/

**June 2016**

It was the second week of the new school year, I was still on getting to know terms with my classmates because half of them are new to our school and the other half were old students but I never really gotten to know them before.

I looked at my classmates one by one, they were all good looking but neither of them gotten my attention, except for one.

“Lee Jeno” I whispered.

I was looking at him by a far, he was strange yet so attractive. Why didn’t I see him here before? I’ve been in this school for almost twelve years and he was here for almost ten,I think. Am I almost that blind not noticing this beauty infront of me?

He has this cold aura surrounding and he also has this bad boy vibe to him but Im sure he isn’t.

“Staring at Lee Jeno,eh?”Donghyuck said while nudging me to get my attention.

“Well who wouldn’t?” I said back.

“He’s the talk of the school since the start of the year. Word has it he is still affected with his break up with Yeri two years ago”Chenle said.

“Yeri as in the member of that dance squad?” They both nodded.

“Yes that Yeri and word has it he is still inlove with Jeno, so better keep your distance Nana” Chenle said back before leaving with Hyuck to go to the cafeteria.

Keep distance? Im his class president how can I keep distance?

**July 2016**

Days roll by and we never really talked, he keeps distancing himself from all of us, the only person who can talk to him is Yukhei, his bestfriend.

Many girls and boys tried to get his attention, I even saw one cringey attempt of a girl in our class. She was yelling Jeno’s name in a cute way and when she gotten the attention of him, she immediately did some cute faces. I swear I almost barf on spot.

“Are you gonna try to get his attention” my cousin, Mark said.

“No” why would I even try? Im not even sure If I like him.

“You always call his name in class for not listening to your everyday reminders” so? I do that to the other boys too.

“And when you gotten his attention, you start being red and shutter while you continue speaking” well it’s not my fault his good looking and his stares are mesmerizing.

“You know, you guys would be a cute pair in the future” I immediately smack him, it was making my insides full of butterflies.

“Just ask Hyuck out you loser” I said before leaving him.

**August 2016**

August came and he grew fond of Chenle because of their similar taste in Music, Me and Him are still on not talking terms. I only talk to him when I need him for school work or when Im giving out the daily reminders in homeroom.

I feel jealous sometimes because Chenle really gotten his attention, and he seems to smile more around Chenle.

Don’t tell me he likes Chenle? But he’s nowhere near Chenle’s Ideal type.

“Class, group yourself into five for a group project” I stood up and find a group of smart intellectuals because the work will be more easier.

Chenle and Hyuck obviously paired together and I was not going near them because they are gonna be free loaders like last year.

“Hey Jaemin lets be in a group together ” I was shocked when Lee Jeno suddenly approached me, he has his stoic face on and he suddenly asked me that.

“Sure? Why not” we paired up with three more boys who look like free loaders but I didn’t care anymore because Lee Jeno just asked me to be with a group with him.

That day was the start of us talking to each other.

We exchanged numbers and started texting for our project until it became casual texting like ‘how was your day’ or ‘sleep well let’s talk again tomorrow’. We became very close after the group project and since our first successful group project we keep on choosing each other to be group mates.

I started developing feelings and the first one I told was a good friend named Renjun. Me and Renjun were like two people who clicked easily.

When I told him he was really supportive and he keeps on saying that we looked good together.

“I know Jeno is kinda scary at first but his friends keep on telling me that he is really a sweet guy, he just needs somebody to  
love and accept him for who he is” Renjun said to me when I confessed to him my crush on Jeno.

I told Chenle next because he was good with advices but when I told him, he kept laughing at me.

“Who would’ve thought you Na Jaemin fell for the poker face prince named Lee Jeno! Oh my god I need to tell your mom about this” he said while laughing at my face.

When it was Hyuck turn to be told about my silly crush on Jeno, he went crazy. He was like ‘I told you so’ and after we cried and was like ‘my baby is all grown up’.

“I never saw this day coming, Im so proud of you Nana! My baby is all grown up, where is Mark I need to tell him”

Donghyuck really went to find Mark even if he was still crying.

I have weird friends, don’t judge me.

 

Months passed, me and Jeno became more close, telling each other secrets kind of close. We were hanging out more and texting more than usual.

We went on casual hangouts like the mall, the arcade or the amusement park.

I was already falling and I was wishing he will catch me in the end.

**November 2016**

November came and it was his birthday. I was fighting the urge to buy him a gift but I ended up buying a shirt for him that says fighting in the center. We were sitting next to each other because obviously Im the president and I make the seat plan.

On the day of his birthday we were casually sitting right next to each other and I was thinking a plan on how to give the gift to him, I tried many attempts but they kept on failing.

Luckily he asked me why I didn’t greet him yet and I a panicked gay just throw the gift on his lap and just murmured a small “happy birthday Jeno”. He was all happy receiving the gift and he told me to wait for him to give a gift on my birthday but I told him no need.

Just seeing him makes me already happy.

**December 2016**

December 25th came and I greeted all my classmates with the same selfie and message that says “Merry Christmas!”. I looked at some of the replies but one thing brought my attention, Jeno’s reply. I quickly pressed to open and I was surprised on what I saw. A personal video greet that says “Merry Christmas Jaemin I hope your family is having a big feast because you eat to much hahaha joke! Have fun see you in January”.

**January 2017**

January came and that’s the month for our Junior High School pictorial came. For the solo pictures for the yearbook I went a little extra but Jeno loved it. That was the time we had our first picture together. He said it was cute and I should make it my screen saver but I told him in his dreams.

Later that month we had our second picture together but it was in a Polaroid form, he kept the picture.

“We both look cute together! Im keeping the picture” he obviously changed, from the stoic face guy who keeps sitting on the back corner to a guy who keeps on smiling and socialize like a normal person.

Many people said it was because of me, but I said  
“No it was because of him”.

**February 2017**

February, this month was both the worst and the semi best out of all. Semi best because we had our class retreat and it was fun but as the class president I was assigned to do the work.

The last night of the retreat I gave him a letter but it was like a bro to a bro, I was not ready to confess that I like him it was too early.

‘Hey Jeno, here’s a unexpected letter from your closest friend, Na Jaemin!  
I made this letter when you left the room earlier so yeah. I just wanna say thank you for being my friend and for being always their when I need you. I would also like to apologize for always teasing you and calling you a weird hetero and a fake hetero.  
I hope you always smile because your eye smile is so beautiful it makes my inside barf, kidding. But always smile because it makes you more good looking and maybe it can swoon over your crush.  
You always said that you like someone, who’s the lucky boy? I know your gay so I hope you tell me who is the boy so I can help you. Don’t tell me it’s Renjun? NoRen is real? Oh My God!  
Im not gonna make the letter longer. So yeah bye and have a good nice always!  
Love,  
Na Jaemin’

The letter was so random because I tried writing it so fast and less obvious that I like him. I even let Renjun read it for confirmation.

Wait did I mention that him and Renjun were becoming close? Yes they were getting close and it made me kinda jealous. I converted my jealousy into teasing them and making a ship name called ‘NoRen’ and since the day I called them NoRen our classmates start joining in. They became the talk of the school and Renjun was blaming me for it becoming the talk of the school but I just laughed it out.

So back to February time, Prom came and it was like hell. I wore a gray tuxedo with a black bow tie and Jeno was wearing a black tuxedo with a grey bow tie, I promised we didn’t plan this. When we saw each other we laughed so loud and he even called me his ‘soulmate’ because of the tuxedo preferences. He even said “You look gorgeous tonight,Jaemin”.

That day I came into conclusion to confessing to him. I think Im ready to tell him that I like him with all my heart, wait that sounds weird.

He asked me to damce with him, and obviously I accepted the offer. He led me to the middle of the dance floor and he held my waist tightly, I wrapped my arms around his neck.

“You really look gorgeous tonight” He said and I laughed.

“Well thank you Mr.Lee” I said back.

We swayed gently in the middle and I can feel glares from the girls around us.

“Are you confessing to the boy you like today?” I asked.

It was a random question but I felt it was so right.

“Yes at the last song Im confessing to him” The butterflies in my stomach went wild.

I was not assuming that I will be his last dance but I was hoping that I will be the one.

After the whole song he escorted me back to my sit, he said he will dance with me again after dancing all of his fangirls.

We danced three times and I was hoping for the last dance.

“Okay boys and girls, grabe your love ones because we are having the last dance” I immediately sitted straight after hearing what the MC said.

I was waiting for Jeno to ask me to be his last dance but then I saw him confessing to Renjun at the center of the dance floor while the DJ was playing ‘Dying Inside’.

I cried that day and went straight out of the venue.

I didn’t care about the people around me looking at me like a freak.

I headed straight to my apartment and locked myself in my room.

 

I remember Renjun bombarding me with messages, he was so sorry but I keep on telling him I was okay. His last text made me laugh so hard, he said and I quote ‘I know you like Jeno but no hard feelings right?’

No hard feelings? What do you mean by no hard feelings?

I drowned myself with work after that, I made our whole Junior Thesis all by myself even it was a group project.

Prom wasn’t the worst out of the events that happened. The worst one was third wheeling the two on their date, yes I third wheeled. I did it twice by the way.

The first one was unexpected because I was just helping Renjun for their Junior thesis because I was already done with ours then Jeno suddenly came, I almost left but Renjun asked me to stay. So I stayed and experienced the torture of having your friend and crush being all clingy to each other.

The second one was the most horrible experience in my whole life. Me and Renjun had plans to eat outside school after exams and Jeno suddenly appears and clings to Renjun like he was going to leave him. I really wanted to leave them but they keep on pulling me back saying that I should stay and enjoy. We went to the karaoke bar after we ate and I almost cried on the spot when Jeno sang a stupid love song for Renjun and it was in Chinese.

I feel like Renjun was enjoying me suffering because when we were alone in school he keeps on asking if Im okay or if Im already moving on.

Ever since that day I kept distance.

**March 2017**

The day before Graduation and I finally had the courage to make a letter for him. It took me days to finish the letter, while I was writing it I was having mental breakdowns in the middle and I will cry the whole night. I keep on remembering that all the things we did were just meaningless to him and it was purely friendship.

The letter was ten pages full of my regrets and my memories about our times together. I never expected this to be too emotional for me, I expected it to be sincere and just like a normal farewell.

“Here goes nothing” I grabbed the folder I bought last week and placed the letter inside.

 

It was already graduation, I was a crying mess because Im gonna miss my teachers especially Sir Jaehyun, my class advisor.

After graduation me and my class had our last class picture, we all hugged and cried because we had fun as a class even though all the hardships we faced.

I was looking for Jeno after all of my classmates left to go to their group of friends.

I stopped in my tracks after seeing him, he was with Renjun. Renjun was introducing Jeno to his parents, and I can see the parents support for the both of them.

I looked at the ten pages letter and looked at them.

“Im not ready” I whispered.

Im not ready to face him and tell him about all my feelings, Im not ready to tell him that I love him already.

This was a stupid idea to begin with, why did I even think of confessing to him?

“Nana are you okay?” I looked at Chenle and smiled.

“Nothings wrong Lele, Lets just leave and celebrate our graduation”

We left and that was the last time I saw Lee Jeno.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do you guys want to read the 10 pages letter? If you want Im gonna put it in the 4th chapter. Comment down below if you want.


	2. The News

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is already the present.

Summer was ending and I was getting more and more excited for school, not that I love learning but Im gonna see my friends that I didn’t see for a long time and maybe meet some new faces.

I already bet a hundred bucks that this school year will be the best one yet. No more drama, no more one sided love stories and no more him.

The news of him transferring to a different university is still fresh in my mind and it makes me wanna dance.

I still remember how Renjun was crying through the phone telling me the news that his boyfriend was moving to a different school. 

Renjun was a bit insensitive because first of all why did he rant all his problems with Jeno with me? Like he knows I still like Jeno and I was still on my moving on process. But it was good that he told me, moving on will be more easy because Im not gonna see him anymore.

“Do you even plan on leaving your house?” Hyuck asked.

Me and my best friends namely Chenle and Donghyuck were video chatting each other, they apparently miss my presence, well who doesn’t?

“No” I said back.

Im more comfortable laying my back in my bed eating spicy cheetos than going outside where people socialize and have fun, sounds too introverted?

But in serious note I really don’t like going out, I feel like there’s too much drama outside and I don’t like to be a part of that.

“It’s been two months since summer break and the only thing you have done is stalking him on social media!” I rolled my eyes at them.

Well I’ve done other things besides that and that’s binge watching Exo videos and listening to sad love songs.

Being locked up in your own home doesn’t mean you drown yourself in social media only.

“Im not stalking him in his social media because for starters he only has facebook, who uses facebook nowadays? Im stalking his brother Taeyong, he apparently has instagram and Twitter.” They both rolled their eyes on my statement.

What I speak the truth and the truth is who uses facebook nowadays? Even my mom has instagram and Twitter.

“How can you even move on if you keep stalking his brother or him? Him and Renjun are still together” it’s hard to forget your first love even it was just one sided.

Lucky for my friends they found their soulmates even though Hyuck’s soulmate is my cousin Mark Lee. It was quite controversial at first because for starters my Cousin and my bestfriend together? Like that was a big no no but eventually I accepted them.

“We’re not even sure if they’re still together, both of them doesn’t post pictures or update the thirsty NoRen fans about them” I said back.

Renjun is one lucky guy and he is not even posting one picture of Jeno in his Instagram.

“They want a private relationship Nana, not all of us want a public relationship unlike your fantasy with Jeno if you both got together” Okay he has a point but who wouldn’t want to brag that they have a Lee Jeno in their life?

“Stop ranting Hyuck, remember he was the one responsible for Renjun and Jeno’s relationship. He bro zoned Jeno from the very beginning and he keeps telling Renjun it was okay if they got together. This is all Nana’s fault if your asking me, you should’ve made the move when you gotten the chance.” it was not my fault that I panicked that day and called him bro and the thing with Renjun, I still feel betrayed. He was the first one to know that I like Jeno and he suddenly stole him from me. Well technically he didn’t stole Jeno because from the very beginning he was never mine.

“I really thought Jeno liked you” Chenle continued, Liked me? I thought so too.

“I never really thought Jeno liked you because again for starters you bro zoned him! Who does that? Lele’s right this is your fault” If we were talking personally I would already smack Hyuck’s ass with a pole.

“You cried remember after you knew I liked him!” I said.

“Well that was before and now Im disowning you for not making a move before” It’s not my fault I didn’t make a move.

“Stop it Hyuck” Chenle warned.

“Can we stop talking about me and Jeno? Lets talk about Chenle and that guy from the smart class” I changed the topic, it was still painful to remember what happened last school year. I still haven’t moved on from him because he was so precious to me and I was so stupid for what I did before.

“Ugh nevermind! Hyuck continue roasting Nana please” Chenle begged when I opened the topic about the blond hair kid from the smart class.

“You mean the Advance Science class?” Hyuck asked and I nodded.

“Jisung is just a friend” Hyuck did the sponge bob meme face.

“Friend my ass Chenle! Friends don’t go on dates every Friday” I saw a little blush on Chenle’s face after Hyuck said that.

”it’s called casual hangouts!” Casual hangouts my ass, who holds hands in casual hangouts?Chenle really is a bad liar.

“Jisung is perfect for you! Just say yes to him already” I jokingly said.

“How did you know he was courting me? I didn’t tell you guys!” Wait what?

“WHAT HE’S COURTING YOU? I WAS JUST JOKING ON SAYING YES TO HIM” He went quiet and left the video call.

“Caught red handed” Hyuck laughed and ended the three hour video call.

I turned my laptop off and went straight to bed, lying down carefully because of the back pain I felt.

“Again back to you Na Jaemin” I whispered.

Many things were going tru my head but one thing is for sure the memories of last school year came back.

Tears fell from my eyes when the memories came back. 

I was really stupid expecting that he would like me too. Why would he even like me? I was just the class president and a friend to him. I was just a very good friend who he casually texts and ask out to hangouts because he was just bored. 

Why did Renjun never told he also liked Jeno, I would understand if he did. I wouldn’t feel betrayed if he told me.

”Stupid Jeno and Renjun” I whispered while looking at my ceiling.

————————

Why was Donghyuck banging on my door at five in the morning? Mark is not here, he was at Yukhei’s house.

Did he left his phone again here? Or did he just wanna talk about school? Ugh school’s gonna start in three days and Im not even ready.

I walked to the door, my eyes half open because it was really early to wake up. When I opened the door I was greeted by a man wearing a spongebob shirt and a pair of jersey shorts, does Hyuck sleep like a dude at night? This is gonna give me a hetero nightmare.

“Donghyuck why are you here? My mom is gonna get angry” he hushed me and pulled me to my room.

When we were inside, I immediately went to my bed and layed down.

“Dont scream after I tell you the knews” I nodded, still half asleep.

What news can make me scream in five in the morning? Even the news is about the world ending Im still gonna sleep peacefully knowing Im gonna die soon.

“Jeno didn’t pass the exam to the other university” I hummed in respond, I was still sleepy and I only heard Jeno and university.

Hearing his name made my heart flutter a bit, I kinda miss him already but I need to move on and be happy for him and Renjun.

“He is still attending at our university this year” I stood up from the bed and was already fully awake.

What? Jeno is still attending at our school? What happened to that big university he was planning to transfer? Oh my god this is not happening! This is worst than the world ending!

“Please tell me you’re joking,Hyuck. Im disowning you as my cousin in law and telling mark to break up with you if you’re trolling with me” he held both my shoulders and looked me into the eyes.

“I hope I was joking, Na Jaemin but it’s so true that Jeno is still attending at our school. Yuta and Sicheng saw him enter the university with the school requirements” I was having my mental break down. This can’t be true, I can’t face him not right now that Im still clearly inlove with him.

“It’s impossible for me to be his classmate right?” I needed the reassurance because I was stressing out and hyperventilating.

“Ninety-nine percent sure he wont be your classmate because we have about ten classrooms in our year but one percent sure that both of you will be classmates and I know this because fate is a bad player at chess”

God kill me now.


	3. The Fight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This may look a bit messy but ugh I don’t care anymore. I really tried my best at fixing this chapter before publishing it. 
> 
> One more thing before you read this, I had a few changes in chapter 2. If you read chapter 2 when it was first released please re-read it again.

It was the first day of class and I was hyperventilating, why am I this nervous for the first day? Oh yeah I remember, Lee Jeno is still attending at our school and we have a one percent chance on being classmates.

Is he really that dumb for not passing at that nice university? He was like a top student in our class and suddenly he cannot pass a silly entrance exam. How did Yukhei even passed the exam at that school and Jeno can’t? Yukhei is known to be more dumber than Jeno. No offense but it’s the truth.

“Don’t get too nervous,Nana. I know for sure you wont be classmates” I was with my two bestfriends, they keep on reassuring me that me and Jeno won’t be classmates but I have this feeling in my gut we will.

“We can’t be sure Hyuck” the possibilities are endless at this point.

When we arrived,people were already crowding the bulletin board, me and my friends tried inserting ourselves for we can also see the class list. 

Im crossing my fingers now hoping Chenle or Hyuck are my classmates and not Jeno and Renjun. 

I want to avoid the pair so badly, I almost didn’t come to school because of them. The thought of them being my classmates were a nightmare came back to life.

I already cutted ties with them, I even texted Renjun that Im still not okay with the situation and we should just ignore each other at school,I had him blocked after I said that to him.

“Guys I see the classlist” Chenle shouted to us. 

Me and Hyuck went closer to Chenle, trying not to shove the other students. 

When we got closer, I immediately searched my name. Chenle pointed one section he thought he saw my name in and he was right, I looked who were my classmates and I was not happy.

“Ooh Jaemin and Jeno are classmates! And look Renjun is in my class,two sections away from the both of you” Hyuck whispered and I immediately smack him.

My plans to avoid him crumbled into ashes. Can my mom transfer me into a school now? 

“Mrs.Na wouldn’t enroll you to a different school, she already paid half of the school’s fees already” why is my mom being a good parent in times like this? I wish her lazy parent side happened during this kind of situation now. 

“I’m so gonna regret not trying out in a different universities” I whispered before I went to my classroom.

Me,Hyuck and Chenle aren’t classmates but they are classmates with their partners. Why can’t I be classmates with the both of them,like last year?

I entered the classroom, luckily only five students were inside. I grabbed the opportunity to sit at the far back next to the window. 

I kept on thinking of random scenarios of how me and Jeno will interact in class. Will it be through being seat mates or being casually buddies like before? So many possibilities but one things for sure Im dying inside. Why is life so unfair in times like this? Why can’t Chenle be the unlucky on in the group and not me. 

Students were slowly enterting the classroom but there was still no signs of him, am I safe already? 

Someone already sat by my side, a guy named ‘Felix’ if I remember correctly. The scenario of him being my seat mate is already crossed out.

I interacted with some of my classmates who sat near me especially Felix who sat right beside me and I didn’t anymore notice who was entering the classroom.

“Hey is this seat taken” a sudden voice asked. 

That voice, I know only one person who has that kind of voice. 

“No one is sitting their, feel free to take that seat” Hyunjin said to the person.

I didn’t looked at him, I feel he didn’t recognize me yet. 

From all the available chairs in the class, why did he choose the one who is apparently infront of my seat.

“What’s your name?” Hyunjin was trying to have a conversation with Jeno, please distract him while I try to escape.

Wait escaping is not a option anymore, classes will start in ten minutes.

“Lee Jeno! Apparently you’re a new student?” I sighed in relief because Hyunjin really distracted him. 

Im safe, I just need to shut up.

“Hey Jaemin why are you quiet now?” Why did Felix say my name? This is not a good time in saying my name.

I looked at Jeno and he was already turning his head to look at me, his eyes were full of shock.

“Jaemin? Na Jaemin?” Jeno called. 

If I would die right now, blame Lee Felix. 

“Jeno, long time no see! Didn’t expect you to be my classmate” I faked a smile and immediately looked away and acted looking for someone to enter.

“We have so many things to catch on to! You literally cut me off after graduation” he said in a slightly angry voice.

How can I keep on talking to you when I was badly hurt inside? 

“Sorry about that then” I said back to him.

This was the hardest conversation I had with him, it was making my heart beat so fast and I can’t breathe properly anymore.

“Let’s talk after class! I can treat you Lunch” He said and I nodded after. 

Who’s gonna run away after class? Me.

——————  
The bell rang and that means it was already lunch time. I gathered all my stuffs and left the classroom quickly before Jeno even tries to talk to me.

Sorry but Im still not ready to face you and the catching up you said earlier is already no need. Im perfectly fine not knowing what happened with your perfect relationship with Renjun.

I went to Donghyuck’s classroom and waited for him, I was not even gonna dare going near Chenle’s room because he is classmates with Renjun. 

“Hey did you waited long?” Hyuck asked when he finally went out of his room.

“I’ve waited for less the three minutes so no I didn’t wait that long.” He laughed at me and we went to the cafeteria.

When we arrived we already saw Chenle waving his hand at us, he was seating right besides Park Jisung, the guy who was courting him. 

We went near them and sat right infront of them.

“Hi Jisung” me and Hyuck greeted.

He was shy but he greeted back with a small ‘hi’. 

Donghyuck and Jisung were the ones who went in line to buy our lunch. 

“Renjun tried asking me about you” Chenle said after the two left.

“Why?” Why would Renjun even try asking about me, he needs to be happy that Im avoiding them.

“He wanted to talk to you privately but I told him back off” I laughed.

Talk to me privately? What do you even need from me? To completely back off from your boyfriend? Sorry hun but faith put us together is the same classroom, not my fault. 

“Food is here!” Hyuck sang and handed us what we ordered.

While we were eating,Jisung suddenly stopped and he was looking at my back. 

Don’t tell me Jeno is there?

“Jaemin” that voice,can they disturb me when I already finished eating or when I already get over Jeno.

“Renjun, I told you don’t get near Nana” I can hear that Chenle was pissed but I kept silent.

A angry Chenle is someone I don’t want to deal with. 

“I need to talk to him, I don’t care if you’re all angry at me but I just need to talk to Na Jaemin” I stood up and faced him.

Renjun, a old friend who betrayed me and who played with my feelings.

Before I would be smiling if I was facing him but now all I feel is the bitterness inside me.

The bitter feeling I felt for him were rising and I just wanna punch him right on the spot. 

“What do you need? Can you see I was eating. If you wanna talk maybe later or never”He was getting annoyed but I kept my composure.

Im ready to put on a fight, if needed.

“Can we talk in private?” I shook my head.

“No, say it here or leave” He looked at me straight in the eyes.

“Nana it would be better if we talk in private” he said back.

“I said say it here and you have no more rights on calling me Nana. Just say it Renjun because I am hungry and I wanna finish my Lunch peacefully” He looked down after what I said.

“Im sorry” what? Im what?

“What?” Did he just say sorry? 

“Im sorry for everything I’ve done” I went quiet for a minute.

He was sorry for everything he had done? It took him months to realize I was hurting so badly on what he did? This is mockery! 

“What are you sorry for? What you did to me before? Tell me Renjun what did you do to me before.” I want him to say it all infront of me.

“I stole Jeno from you” he whispered.

“Renjun that’s not even near the reason why I cutted the ties with you and Jeno. Remember a few months ago, you kept on pushing me to move on from your boyfriend even if you know I liked him first. You keep on reminding me that you were already a couple and I had no more chances, but what did I do I just laughed.Second remember you planning secretly to make me your third wheel? If your friend didn’t told me, I would believe I was unlucky in life. You made me believe I had no chance even if you supported me from the beginning. You know what Renjun, I felt betrayed by you! I treated you genuinely as a friend of mine, I never planned to backstab you even after knowing what you did! I treated you as a good friend of mine, the heck I treated you like you were my bestfriend!” I was on the verge of crying, it felt good releasing all this things in my head.

Renjun was already crying right infront of me but I showed no mercy to him. I still felt a little bad but how can I forgive the person who was the reason why my heart is this broken.

“Renjun did you even feel sorry for me back then? Did you even supported me genuinely?” Many students were already looking but I didn’t care.

“I really did support you from the start but in the middle I found myself falling for him too. Im sorry that I talked to him behind your back, Im sorry if I told him bad things about you and Im sorry for doing all the mean things I did before. I love him soo much and I destroyed our friendship, I never thought it would end up like this” my eyes widen when he said he told Jeno bad things about me. 

“What did you told him? Renjun what the heck did you told Jeno?” My voice grew louder, my palms were getting wet because of the pressure. 

“He was starting to like you and I got scared, I told him that you were just flirting with him like what you do to the rest of the boys” My hand form a fist after what he said.

“The hell Renjun? Did you really gone that far? You know and everybody knows that I never flirt with anybody, even if I love that person!” I grabbed his collar and lift him up.

“I may be gay but I don’t tolerate this kind of behavior”I was about to punch him when someone grabbed my hand preventing me to punch. 

“What the he- Lee Jeno let go of me!”I was shock seeing Jeno right beside me but I didn’t care my anger was more higher that the shock I felt.

I never thought Renjun would betray me this much. I even gave him a friendship bracelet to show how genuine my friendship is to him and he did this? 

“Jaemin violence agaist violence will not solve your problem. Let go of Renjun and calm down” Trying to protect your boyfriend? No thanks, I need a good punch before I eat again.

“Stop protecting your boyfriend,Jeno” I whispered.

I was trying to pull my hand back but his grip was strong. 

“Ex boyfriend” he said back.

Wait what? 

“What are you saying? Speak up” please tell me Im hearing wrong.

“He is now my ex,Jaemin”


	4. The Confrontation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don’t expect A+ work and I would explain some stuff at the end note so yeah I hope you enjoy <3.

I slowly removed my hand from Renjun’s collar because I was a bit taken aback from what Jeno had said.

“Renjun go” Jeno said to his ex.

Renjun took that opportunity to run away from the scene, what a obedient scaredy-cat.

“Why did you let him go I was waiting for a nice punch!” Donghyuck said jokingly

“Shut up Donghyuck!” I heard Chenle whispered.

“I was waiting for a good punch too, but I love drama more” Jisung added.

I didn’t bother to look at them or even say a word, I was still in a state of shock. I was trying to comprehend on what he said but I can’t.

Jeno and Renjun finally broken up? When? How? They were the perfect couple, said by their shippers and supporters.

They were already accepted by their parents, they were happy? A simple fight can’t tear them apart that easily, how is it possible that they finally broken up?

Yes, Im happy that they have broken up but I can’t help myself to be curious on what the reason was.

“How?” I whispered.

“Why did you guys broke up?” I asked again.

Jeno looked at me and dragged me out of the cafeteria. I didn’t try resisting or stopping him, I wanna know why and this is the only way I could find my answer.

I heard Chenle yelling my name but Jeno didn’t care, he continued dragging me out. After a long walk he pulled me inside an old classroom, obviously this is not anymore put into use.

In arriving I immediately removed my hand from his grip and massage the area where he held it. It was a bit painful from the grip of his hands.

“Are you hurt?” I shook my head.

“It’s just red” I said back.

We were quiet for a moment, I was staying at the corner of the room and he was at the door. We could only hear the bird chirps outside the room and the loud wind at the window.

I never expected that I would be stuck in a room with Lee Jeno, why is fate trying to play with me right now? I was expecting for us to talk but not like this. This is seriously Renjun’s fault, if he didn’t come to me earlier this wouldn’t happen. I kinda feel bad for him now, he just did all those things because he loves Jeno too but it wasn’t right. He could have just talk to me like a real friend would do and not backstab me. Maybe I would help him if he told me he liked Jeno, I would sacrifice my feelings for our friendship.

“Jeno” I broke the silence.

We can’t stay quiet forever, and I need my answers.

“Did you heard us? Did you heard our conversation?” He looked at me and nodded.

“I heard everything. Why didn’t you told me you like me?” I laughed at what he said.

“Why would I try stealing someone’s boyfriend? Why would I say something and be laughed at? You know me, we were friends for months. You know how shy I get and how easily I can overthink on a small situation. I already accepted that it was a one sided thing and you really saw me as a friend” I was on the verge of crying but I tried stopping myself.

“It wasn’t one sided! I was just manipulated in believing that you were just flirting with me like you do to the rest of the guys” I laughed silently on what he said.

“You really believed that I just flirted with you? Yes I may be clingy to other guys but it was not even near flirting! I can’t believe you see me so lowly Jeno” he looked at me with full of guilt and sadness. He makes me wanna hug him tight and cry all over him.

“Upon discovering it was a lie, I regretted everything! Im really sorry Jaemin, if only I didn’t believe Renjun that time” even if you didn’t believe him I would still be this broken in the end.

“Jaemin please listen to me” he went near me and held my hands.

”all the things we did before was not plain friendship. I would not lower my pride easily if it was just a friend.I regretted all the things I did to you but everything we did together will always remain in my heart.” He breathed deeply then continued.

“I always said you look beautiful and you really are. Yes I asked Renjun out after knowing his lie about you, but what I felt for him his no where near what I feel for you. Eversince we became friends, I always saw different sides of you and it always amazes me. Yes I never show any signs of me liking you but I really did feel something for you before. I know you saw me kiss him many times but I didn’t feel the spark that time but seeing you earlier at class I felt the spark I was waiting for.” my heart became soft and my ‘Im okay facade’ disappeared.

”stop” I whispered.

I wiped my tears and laughed like a crazy person.

”class is about to start” I whispered again

“I want you to tell me everything at my house later, Please be honest with me and I will be honest with you” After saying that I left the place.   
——————-

“So you’re telling me that you and Renjun broke up before classes even started? Last week? Seriously?” He was telling me the story on how he and Renjun broke up, I should be sad for Renjun because we’re friends but why am I feeling this joy in my heart right now.

“It was totally fine with both of us, he told me someone is more deserving to love me than him and I told him he deserves someone who can fight for their love” I should talk to Renjun and say sorry for lashing out on him and for almost beating him up.

We continued talking about what happened with them and Renjun, we talk about the different reasons why their relationship was toxic, we also talked about how he misses me when I cutted our communications. After the long talk,I cutted him off.

“Hey I want you to read something.” I stood up from my bed and went to my drawer.

There I saw the ten pages letter that I wanted to give him before.

“Here I want you to read that” he looked at me confused and then he started reading it.

——————  
 _Jeno,_

_Hi Jeno sorry for the unexpected letter, I really just want to get this out of my system. I don’t know where to even start, I don’t know how to begin. I never really thought this through when I decided to make you a letter. Im still deciding if this is like a confession letter or a farewell._

_Maybe you’re confuse right now, why would I be confessing to you? Were like best buddies, and suddenly Im stating here that Im confessing to you.Well for starters I like you ever since I laid my eyes on you. Wait that sounds kinda chessy but it’s kinda true._

_Maybe you’re thinking that I took advantage of our friendship, that’s completely false. Yes, I may be clingy but that is just my nature around people. Well when you cling to me my heart goes crazy but I try to divert my attention to other things._

_I know you were out of my league from the very beginning but my feelings for you were strong but I tried ignoring it. My mom use to say ignoring your feelings hurts more than the actual feeling itself, she was right._

_I thought I was obvious, half of our class already knew I liked you but why didn’t you notice? I remember Yukhei teasing me on liking you, he was your bestfriend but he promised me on not telling you in exchange of having a date with my friend,Jungwoo._

_Jeno in the process on liking you I really saw many sides of you. I saw your clingy side, your weird side, your very bad side and your sad side. My favorite was your weird side because that’s almost close to your normal side. I hope you only show that side of yours to me._

_Do you remember the time we talked about marriage because our class was about same sex marriage? I remember you said that when you find the perfect person in your life you will do anything for them even when you face all the struggles in life. I also remember we had to do a presentation about the topic and you were the leader of our group. I still blush at your idea of we get married. You didn’t notice that I was blushing so hard at our presentation when you held my hand and looking at my eyes so sincerely. I was really imagining that time we really got married._

_Do you also remember the times I caught you staring at me? When I caught you, you will just say ‘you look beautiful’ and I would smack you with my notebook._

_And lastly do you remember our first fight? We acted so childish that day. Im so happy you lowered your pride and went to my house just to say sorry. I remember you delivering pizza and wearing a dinosaur onesie just to cheer me up._

_I really thought you like me too, I really thought you had feelings for me even just for a little bit but I was wrong. The night I saw you dance with Renjun for the last dance I lost hope._

_I can’t anymore count the sleepless nights I had because of you. I can’t even remember when was the last time I had a good night rest without breaking down into tears. Just the thought of you not liking me back hurts so much to the extent of me overthinking stuffs._

_I was badly hurt the night you and Renjun finally became together but I tried smiling it off. I think you didn’t notice I left the venue while the last song was playing. You were at the center of the dance floor, you were both hugging while dancing. When I came home our class group chat was full of the pictures of you both dancing._

_I remember sending a message to Renjun that night, I was a bit drunk that time. I told him my congratulations and my sorrys to him, I even told him ‘please take care of Jeno for me’. I was pissed with his reply after, he was like mocking me and his last message was ‘no hard feelings’. His message made my cry a thousand tears because I felt betrayed._

_Days pass and I focused more on my studies than the both of you. I remember one day Renjun asking for my help, I gladly accept because I love helping other people in school related work. I was shock when you arrived then our meet up for work became your date.I was completely ignored that time and I was the one who finished your work. A simple thank you would be enough from the both of you but all you did was kiss infront of me.Why did Renjun ask me to help him if he would just end up kissing the hell out of you? It was kinda disrespectful, We were their for work and not for making out. I obviously cried when I left, I felt neglected,betrayed and cheated on._

_Im already tired on crying everynight thinking I don’t have a chance with you, I hate the thought that come in my mind every night. It makes me so miserable and I can’t bare it anymore._

_Im so stupid for crying over both of you, I was the one who started ‘Noren’ and Im the one who regretted it in the end._

_Maybe this is my karma?_

_I don’t want this to be longer so Jeno, I love you. I love you with all my heart, I am willing to love you until the end but my heart can’t take it anymore. I said in the beginning I would try and win you, and not give up on my feelings for you but Im sorry. Even Im still loving you with all my heart, I can’t bare trying to hope that me and you will still have a chance. Maybe one day when we meet again I can say I finally moved on._

_Please be happy with him while I watch from afar,_  
Please make him the most happiest boy on the planet,  
Both of you are still my friends and that’s why Im wishing you all the luck with your relationship.

_Im so happy Im letting go of my ‘Im happy for you’ facade everyday._

_Sincerely,_  
Na Jaemin  
——————

His eyes were starting to get watery and I panicked. I grabbed the nearest cloth in my room which is a old shirt hanging on the side of my bed, and immediately wipe the tears that were starting to fall.

He looks like a lost kid while crying, it was making my heart sad and happy at the same time.

“Why are you crying?” He looked me in the eyes and suddenly tackled me into a hug.

“Now Im starting to regret not talking to you at our graduation, things would have been different. Did you really mean all this things in your letter?” I hugged him back and nodded in his shoulder.

The happiness I feel today is unbearable, I can’t believe I finally confessed. After a year of liking him, I finally confessed. Even though the process was a bit dramatic but I don’t really care anymore.

“Do you still like me though? It has been three or four months since graduation?” I look at him in the eyes and stare at them for a moment.

“Jeno, I’ve never stopped liking you—wait scratch that— I have never stopped loving you. My feelings for you id only growing and never ending.” He smiled and his tears were again falling.

“Why are you like this Jaemin? You are making me emotional!” He whined and I really found it cute.

“I love you so much Jeno!” I yelled and hugged him more tighter.

“I love you too,Jaemin”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn’t make the letter 10 pages because my inspiration for the letter was my own letter for my crush and like the story it was one sided. Once I start writing the letter I would suddenly stop because I remember the corny things I wrote in the letter. 
> 
> So I want to say sorry :(


End file.
